losing grip*

Kenape ekk manusie ade sifat negative? is it natural to have bad feelings, negative feelings or is it we who encourage the feelings to become negative? I'am not talking about others,,but I'am talking about myself..I don't know..lately my negative feelings towards others is likely to be stronger than my positive feelings..I am afraid this feelings will ruin and destroy my relationship with everyone..everyone including my bestest friend, my closest friend,,my oldtime friends,,my 4years friends and even my boyfriend..I don't know how to describe the feelings but what I'm sure is that everytime the feelings came near me, I tend to welcoming it,,not even bother to avoid it,,not even bother to think of the effects..not even bother to think of the consequences.. And the worst thing is that,, I'm not regretting it..at all..ermm..not at all..a lil regret maybe..but the regret itself doesn't do any good..I tend to shut myself from people..shut myself from my friends..hoping that all the bad feelings, all the bad things will faded away..but I know this is not the solution..

I really hope I'm getting back my style,,my rhythm,,my life,,and I know there's only one way to avoid the negative feelings..

'kembali kepade yg SATU'

God, help me out of this..give me back the real me,,the positive me,,the cheerful me,,the cool me..please..don't let me losing my grip..=(